WHY, DAVE, WHY?

Apart from Ron, our Japanese Peach LOLers, we also have at home Dave, a Belgian Malinois.

Now, I hate Dave and you have to understand why.

Dave is a huge canine and he is so wild that we naturally had to have him on a leash. To make sure that he’d be able to protect the house entrances, we situated him in the garage, between the front door and a side entrance. When the front door is locked, we have to pass by where Dave is, which is such a huge challenge considering his size and scary sharp teeth. There have been so many times when I had to press the doorbell countless times, wait forever or even text people who are inside just so they could open the front door for me.

I have to admit I am scared shit of Dave. Whenever I go near him, he smells not just my take-home grub but more importantly my fear as well. The way he looks at me, the way he stands on his two feet, the way he air-bites, the way he breathes through his mouth while his saliva-covered tongue sticks out – they all leave me in fright.

Another frightening thing about Dave is how intelligent he is that he manages to bite his way out of his leash, making him free to run around – and us locked inside wherever we are – until my uncle grabs a hold of him and puts him back on his leash.

Yesterday, Dave broke free once again and since the sliding door was open, he was able to go inside. Demo-Niqui and our maid Lourdes (who talks, screams and most probably moans in falsetto) was able to dash inside their rooms and shut the door close. Danielle, on the other hand, was so shocked she wasn’t able to go inside any of the rooms and instead ended up being chased by Dave. She was able to go out of the house and was finally cornered by the dog. Hopeless, terrified and frustrated, she ended up screaming one memorable sentence that strangely made the dog go away.

Just what was the sentence?

“Bakit mo sinisira ang buhay ko?” my 5-year old, English-speaking cousin passionately screamed at the dog, obviously damaged by a month's worth of telenovelas with the maids.

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